guildenstern's dilemma
April 9th, 2001, 2:59 p.m.

earlier / later

If you don't have it already, download Silverchair's "Tommorrow" .... ah memories!!

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"Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are ... at Best Buy"

-- by: Nick Rose

Rosencrantz(a.k.a. Customer): "Do you have an internal PCI 'scuzzy' adaptor card?"

Guildenstern(a.k.a. Employee/Nick): "No, I'm sorry, we don't"

Rosencrantz:"What do you mean?"

Guildenstern: "I mean to say that 'No, I'm sorry, we don't have them"

Rosencrantz: "You mean to say that 'No, I'm sorry, we don't have them'! or 'No, I'm sorry we don't carry them'!"?

Guildenstern: "Exactly"!

Rosencrantz: "Exactly what"?

Guildenstern: "Exactly to what you said".

Rosencrantz: "Well, which part of what I said"?

Guildenstern: "The part that was correct"!

Rosencrantz: "I would hope so......."

Guildenstern: "As would I"!

Rosencrantz: "But it remains to be seen which part was correct"!

Guildenstern: "I see precisely which part is correct".

Rosencrantz: "Alright, let's give this a try again".

Guildenstern: "A'ight".

Rosencrantz: "Do you carry an Internal PCI 'scuzzy' adaptor card"?

Guildenstern: "No, I'm sorry, we don't".

Rosencrantz: "Why not"?

Guildenstern: "Because we don't"!

Rosencrantz: "Why not"?

Guildenstern: "I don't know, I guess Best Buy doesn't want to carry them"!

Rosencrantz: "So you want me to go to a competitor"?

Guildenstern: "Not neccessarily, but I don't have what you're looking for"!

Rosencrantz: "So you're telling me to go somewhere else"?

Guildenstern: "I suppose that's your only option here".

Rosencrantz: "This isn't good customer satisfaction"!

Guildenstern: "I'm sorry, but Best Buy doesn't carry what you're looking for"!

Rosencrantz: "I can't believe you're telling me to go somewhere else"!

Guildenstern: "I'm not telling you to do anything, but if you'd like to purchase what you're looking for you're going to have to....".

Rosencrantz: "Great....REAL good customer satisfaction"!!

Guildenstern: "I'm sorry sir, but if I could pull an INTERNAL SCSI ADAPTOR CARD out of my ass and sell it to you I would, but unfortunately I can't ..."

Rosencrantz: "I see...."

Guildenstern: ".... and I'm certainly not going to go to another store, buy that item, come back here, and sell it to you in the name of customer satisfaction".

Rosencrantz: "Are we dead"?

Guildenstern: "What is death"!?

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This is what I got written up for at work a few months ago ... sans the silly first part and the death part.

more to come ....

same Bat-Time, same Bat-Channel!

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