Oh, a magical time filled with tanning beds, fashion meetings, blonde highlighted hair, horrible traffic, Hollister shirts, spikey hair, kegs, paid-for BMWs, and the inane vapidness that makes one with half a brain want to pull a Cobain with a .45.

I thought that one day ... if I stayed in this college wasteland long enough I might actually adapt to the vapidity(if that's a word) of the Greek system and come to accept it for all of it's faults and all of it's ..... faults.

But alas, that day has not yet come, and I doubt if it ever will.

The recent conclusion has dawned on me in the philosophical simplicity of Bugs Bunny ... "If you can't beat em, join em". So, with this simple concept in mind I will attempt to join the greek system without joining it. Because, of course, to join would negate the whole purpose of me starting a fraternity ... which is to negate the Greek system. Lost yet? Good.

Well, now that you've reread that paragraph twice in an attempt to understand it, I believe I have your full attention.

I am going to start a frat that reinforces the opposite of the greek system by negating all of the principles of frat and sorority life. Yes, this fraternity will be devoted to principles like honesty, depth in character, value in good music, thriftiness with money, pride in natural beauty, academic pursuit, true friendship, hatred of gossip, moderation in exercise, success through hard work (nepotism=bad) and appreciation of a good head of brown or red hair.

Who knows, maybe one day the concepts of my anti-fraternity may actually catch on and the world of social groupings can move in a positive direction. Maybe one day people will unite in harmonious unison. Maybe one day young men and women will find that their own self-esteem and knowledge are enough to sustain their weak existences. Haha, yeah right .... and maybe the masses will cease to be less ignorant than a redneck on Meth in COPS.