A New Classic Sham
February 25, 2005, 5:08 p.m.

earlier / later

Now I don't have a problem with the "'New Classics' on TNT" per se, but who in the hell gets to decide what exactly is a "New Classic." Is it a team of apes or perhaps backwoods rednecks or maybe it's just the producers of movies like XxX. Back to the Future, Fargo, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, True Lies, When Harry Met Sally, The Shawshenk Redemption, Caddyshack ... all great movies. But then how do Clockstoppers, Deep Blue Sea, The Long Kiss Goodnight, WaterWorld, and any other Kevin Costner movie get put into this New Classics category. If they "know drama" so well then how could they ever dare to call WaterWorld a New Classic. Damn those apes! Damn them all to hell.

And on the completely unecessary topic of TNT -- How can they say they "know drama"? Isn't it in fact NBC, FOX, CBS, and WB that know drama since they're the networks that produce and finance the actual shows. If playing reruns of other network's dramas counts as "knowing" drama, then I "know" sex because I'm constantly masturbating.

On that note, I have to go learn something.

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